Chapter 6
Atheord would often look at me…
And smile as though he had the whole world.
Then, as if it were a habit, he would quietly whisper,
“You truly are my everything.”
And yet…
I was the one who sent that man away.
Because I couldn’t tell the difference between a dream and reality.
For the past few days, while staying locked inside my room, I had thought about it over and over again.
The days I believed were only a dream became more and more real as time passed.
Eventually…
I began to believe that I was truly alive.
Every morning, Jenna knocked on my door and asked when I planned to get up.
It all felt so real.
I had grown tired of asking her what today’s date was.
The date still pointed to a past that should never have existed.
Little by little…
I realized I had to accept this place as my reality.
And just as I began thinking that perhaps…
This time, I could change everything…
I started regretting my tea with Atheord.
Because I couldn’t tell the difference between dreams and reality…
I had done something foolish.
I didn’t want to repeat the same mistake again.
Not even in a dream.
So…
I had pushed away the man who loved me with all his heart.
The man who treasured me more than anyone else.
Only now, after accepting that this was truly reality…
Did I regret that choice.
Again…
And again.
That was probably why I had no motivation to do anything.
The only good thing was that I hadn’t collapsed and cried my heart out.
With a deep sigh, I let my exhausted body fall back onto the bed.
“Jenna, please tell Aunt that I’m sorry. Tell her I’m not feeling well and can’t come today.”
“But Miss, you’re perfectly healthy. Why are you asking me to lie for you?”
“If she finds out, I’ll be the one who gets scolded!”
Jenna shouted boldly.
She wasn’t wrong.
But…
I simply had no energy.
I sighed again and waved my hand.
“Then just tell her I refused to get out of bed. I’ll accept the scolding.”
“Miss! What happened? Is it because things didn’t work out with that handsome gentleman? Should I send him a message right now? I’ll ask him what he could possibly dislike about our beautiful Miss!”
Jenna, my friend who was closer than any real sister…
Looked ready to storm over to Atheord herself.
Her voice was full of dissatisfaction.
She clearly believed Atheord was the reason I looked so lifeless.
But Jenna simply didn’t know.
The reason things hadn’t worked out…
Wasn’t his fault.
It was mine.
Still lying in bed, I slowly shook my head.
“No. It isn’t because of him. I’m just… very tired.”
“Then is it because of the Count? He keeps bringing invitation after invitation.”
“Hm…? Ah… yes, I suppose.”
Father had been bringing invitations?
For a moment, I wondered whether that had happened in my previous life.
But I didn’t miss the chance to avoid Jenna’s questions.
After my vague answer…
Jenna became angry for an entirely different reason.
“Our Count truly doesn’t understand you at all! Honestly! Your heart has barely recovered from your broken heart, yet he keeps mentioning His Highness the Crown Prince!”
“I suppose you’re right.”
“Seriously! Did he really think I wouldn’t notice? Even if he says they’re invitations from other noble families, don’t go! Do you understand? I’ll reject as many as I can, so don’t worry about it!”
Jenna stamped her foot in anger.
Apparently, while I had stayed inside my room for several days…
Father had brought invitations from several noble families.
And judging from Jenna’s reaction…
Every one of them was simply another excuse to push me toward the Crown Prince.
Considering the kind of man Father was…
It wasn’t surprising.
But…
Had this happened before my regression as well?
“This morning he even tried bringing another one to your room. Honestly… Don’t think about it and just get some rest! The best cure for heartbreak is delicious food and plenty of sleep!”
“Mmm… Thank you.”
As expected.
Brave Jenna.
Wonderful Jenna.
Believing that her Miss was heartbroken…
She once again rolled up her sleeves to protect me.
After returning my blanket…
She walked over to the table where all the invitations had been piled up.
Then she began sorting through them one by one.
“This one! Obviously not!”
“This one too! Absolutely ridiculous!”
“And this one…!”
She grumbled to herself while pushing the invitations aside.
Then suddenly…
She stopped.
Lying in bed with my blanket wrapped tightly around me…
I blinked at her.
“What is it, Jenna?”
She hadn’t just stopped talking.
She had completely frozen.
Holding one invitation in her hand…
She slowly turned toward me.
Her face looked as though she had seen something terrifying.
The confident Jenna from moments ago had completely disappeared.
Very slowly…
She opened her mouth.
“M-Miss… this is…”
“Hm?”
“…It’s an invitation from Her Highness the Princess.”
A moment later…
Still wrapped tightly in my blanket…
I froze as well.
Something like this had happened once before.
In my previous life.
Was it just before I got married?
Or right after everyone learned that Atheord and I were together?
At that time…
I had been refusing every invitation to parties where the Crown Prince was likely to appear.
Then…
An invitation arrived under the name of Princess Delphina Hugh Libre.
I could refuse invitations from noble families.
But I couldn’t refuse an invitation sent by the Empire’s beloved Princess.
Reluctantly…
I went to the Imperial Palace.
And there…
I met the Crown Prince.
The ridiculous things he said to me…
Were impossible to tell anyone.
Naturally…
I never told Atheord.
Perhaps…
That was where everything began.
Perhaps that was when Atheord first started listening to the rumors spreading through high society.
After he later found out I had met the Crown Prince…
He gently asked what we had talked about.
But I never answered.
Because…
The Crown Prince’s words had been so unbelievably shameless.
The real problem…
Started afterward.
Princess Delphina had just turned fourteen.
And she fell in love with my husband.
Delphina Hugh Libre was much younger than her older brother, the Crown Prince.
She was the Empire’s precious little Princess.
A child who had grown up receiving nothing but love.
To her…
Being loved was as natural as breathing.
I had no reason to dislike or hate her.
But after she openly declared that she liked my husband…
She kept sending me invitation after invitation.
I couldn’t refuse the Princess’s invitations.
So every time I reluctantly went to the Imperial Palace…
The Crown Prince would always be there.
And Delphina would immediately run off to see my husband, who worked there.
“Duke Fontaine is so perfect! Duchess, when I grow up, you’ll let me become his second wife, won’t you?”
Had she said that…
About a year after our marriage?
I never knew whether she was simply clever…
Or completely thoughtless.
The brother and sister worked together to make my life miserable.
Yet both of them always smiled as though they had done nothing wrong.
As though I was the strange one for being upset.
That wasn’t all.
She even hinted to my husband that I had feelings for the Crown Prince.
Delphina had always believed everyone would naturally love her.
For the first time in her life…
My husband rejected her.
And as if trying to make up for that rejection…
She became even more persistent as she grew older.
Rejecting the young Princess had been the right thing to do.
But Atheord couldn’t stop her from moving freely around the Imperial Palace.
It was practically her home.
Day after day…
He grew more and more exhausted.
And I…
Became increasingly resentful of the Crown Prince and the Princess, who constantly summoned me.
Yes…
It was that invitation.
But…
That invitation should only have arrived after Atheord and I had officially become a couple.
So why…
Had it already arrived now?
I let out a quiet sigh and waved toward Jenna.
“Tell them I’ll attend. There’s no helping it.”
“You’re not even going to read it?”
“What difference would it make? I’ll have to go anyway.”
“I suppose that’s true…”
“Open it for me and just tell me the date. Please let Aunt know as well.”
“Yes, Miss.”
Jenna reluctantly nodded.
Taking the invitations with her…
She quietly left the room.
Normally…
I should have opened it myself and written a reply.
But now…
Everything felt like too much trouble.
If someone asked me why…
I could only answer…
Everything.
I had decided to keep myself away from Atheord so he would never suffer because of me again.
But…
I had never imagined the pain would be this great.
It felt as though I could burst into tears at any moment.
Simply being unable to stay beside the person I loved…
Made everyday life impossible.
If I already felt like this…
How much more must Atheord have suffered after I left him?
Without warning…
The image of Atheord returned to my mind.
Alone in that dark room.
Holding the strange bottle in his hand.
Then…
The faint smile as he whispered my name.
No…
Stop.
That was only a dream.
Trying to force those dark feelings away…
I shook my head and closed my eyes.
Maybe…
If I slept…
The thoughts would finally stop.
Pulling the blanket over my head once more…
I quietly wished…
I almost wished the world would simply end like this.
“How long are you planning to stay locked inside your room?”
Had it been almost a month?
That was the first thing Father said after finally seeing me again.
During the entire month I stayed in my room…
He had never once come to ask how I was doing.
The only thing he had done…
Was bring invitations to events where the Crown Prince might appear.
His voice sounded like he was scolding a child who had done something wrong.
Without even looking at him…
I let out a cold laugh.
“So… you were curious after all.”
“Of course I was. My grown daughter has been hiding in her room like a child.”
“As you said, I’m already an adult. You don’t need to worry about me. It’s not as though you’ve ever cared before.”
“I am your father, Eloise.”
There it was again.
Those tiresome words.
I laughed bitterly.
Father?
So what?
I looked at him in disbelief.
“Father… please stop pretending to be a parent.”
“What an insolent thing to say.”
