Chapter 16
Her whole body felt heavy. It was probably because she had pushed this fragile body too far and then got caught in the rain.
‘I feel awful.’
She stared blankly at her own hands.
No matter how many times she experienced it, the sensation of killing something was unpleasant.
Yet before she knew it, she had grown used to that filthy feeling—so much so that she no longer hesitated when taking a life.
In the past, she had been a girl who couldn’t even bring herself to kill a single bug.
A miserable yet ordinary noble lady who liked the occasional cake, dresses gifted by Marquis Lissus, and flowers.
But that Erin Lissus no longer existed.
Because if she didn’t kill, she would be the one who died.
Dragging her heavy body along, Erin kept walking.
The subjugation party wasn’t far.
If she went there, the alive Lady Asil and Caron would be waiting for her. And Ferdin would be there too…
‘Waiting?’
Her steps slowly faltered. She wasn’t sure anymore if returning to the subjugation party was the right choice.
Would they really be waiting for her?
She looked down at her hands again—palms stained red with a mixture of her own blood and that of monsters.
Ferdin’s trainee knights disliked her, but they were all kind people.
If it weren’t for them, her past self would have died long ago.
Images of those who had died trying to protect her surfaced in her mind.
The young lady had survived. Then… wouldn’t the future change as well?
If Erin Lissus were to die here as just another victim of monsters…
Then perhaps a better future would unfold.
A future where Ferdin wouldn’t suffer because of her.
If only she were gone… maybe everyone could be happy.
‘No. There are still things I have to change…’
There were still many things she had to change.
Thinking that, Erin forced her heavy feet forward again. But even then, she wasn’t certain.
Was saying there were things to change just an excuse?
Was she simply forcing herself to stay because she wanted to belong with them?
In her previous life, she had always been lonely.
Even though she had been engaged to Ferdin and stayed among them out of obligation, she had always known she didn’t belong.
She couldn’t do anything right and constantly caused trouble for others, dragging down Ferdin’s reputation.
And yet, she still wanted to be with them.
She wanted to laugh and chat among his knights.
“Sir Erin…?”
At the sound of someone calling her, Erin turned her head.
Ferdin was there.
Her gaze met his deep blue eyes, as dark as the depths of a lake.
She swallowed.
With the heightened senses of a Sword Master, she had known someone was nearby—but she never imagined it would be him.
She stared at him, frozen in place.
For some reason, he was alone.
As if he had been rushing somewhere, he was drenched in sweat, staring at her with disbelief.
His ragged breathing made it clear just how urgently he had come.
Had he been busy taking care of the young lady? Erin lowered her gaze, thinking that.
“What on earth…?”
At his words, Erin became aware of her current state.
Even though his rain-soaked blond hair clung messily to his face, he was as beautiful as ever.
But she, covered head to toe in blood, must have looked utterly terrible.
It was impossible for an ordinary person to face a horde of monsters without a scratch.
No—surviving at all was already abnormal.
That was why she had deliberately allowed herself to be drenched in blood.
But she didn’t want him to see her like this.
She looked like a murderer.
It wasn’t wrong—but showing him this side of herself was different.
While Erin was lost in thought, Ferdin hurried toward her and checked her condition. His eyes took in the deep wounds and the fresh traces of blood.
Without hesitation, he took off his coat and carefully wrapped it around her blood-soaked body.
Erin looked up at him, confused. His rough breathing was close enough to feel.
Why…?
In her previous life, she had caused this man’s death.
If she stayed by his side, today wouldn’t be the end of it.
Unexplainable trials would continue to come.
“Please… don’t do this to me.”
“….”
“Don’t be kind to me.”
At her words, Ferdin’s eyes widened.
“Just hate me.”
Like everyone else…
She swallowed the rest of her words.
She had always wanted to say it—that if he had blamed her, he would have survived.
He should have cursed her like others did, called her a coward, despised her as a villainess.
If he had, he would have lived the future that had been meant for him.
‘It’ll be different now.’
The young lady had survived. Now, he would live happily with her.
If Erin just finished everything and disappeared, everyone would be happy.
Thinking that, Erin tried to walk away.
She didn’t want anyone to see her alone with Ferdin.
She didn’t want to leave even the slightest chance that he might be harmed because of her.
But her body was in worse condition than she expected.
This weak body from the past had already reached its limit.
After only a few steps, she felt herself sway.
‘Not now…’
This body couldn’t yet handle the level she had reached in her previous life.
Strength drained from her legs. The ground seemed to rush up toward her.
No—it was more accurate to say she was collapsing.
‘This is going to hurt when I wake up.’
With that final thought, Erin lost consciousness.
* * *
The Lissus Marquisate.
Its massive gates looked as if they would never allow an enemy to pass, and the knights within radiated overwhelming presence.
This force—too powerful for a mere marquis—was built over a lifetime of guarding the border.
And within it, the Marchioness ruled like a queen.
The Marquis rarely returned due to his duties, and Caron was too busy training to care about household affairs.
Thus, all the power he had built had fallen into the hands of his wife.
Marchioness Corellia stood at the top of the castle, looking down below.
‘Fools.’
She twisted her lips into a crooked smile, thinking of the naïvely kind members of the family.
Everything was going smoothly.
At this rate, everything would go according to plan.
She was waiting for a messenger who would soon arrive—and the news he brought would bring her a small delight.
“Raymond.”
At her call, a man waiting in the corner of the room moved.
His movement was unnaturally stealthy for an ordinary person.
“The report Sir Leken brought earlier—did you confirm it?”
“Yes. According to those involved in the merchant group, Erin Lissus truly used a sword. They even said she looked skilled.”
Corellia frowned in annoyance.
“Is that even possible?”
“Normally, no.”
“You know how much effort I put into making sure she couldn’t wield a sword.”
Corellia Lissus. Very few knew her true identity.
In truth, she was a high-ranking knight stronger than the Marquis himself, living as his wife for over a decade while hiding her power.
She glanced at her smooth, uncalloused hands.
In reality, concealed by dark magic, they were rough and scarred—the hands of a warrior.
She was also the one who had witnessed the very first moment Erin picked up a sword.
And she knew just how fortunate that had been.
As a high-ranking knight, Corellia immediately recognized Erin’s talent the moment she swung the blade.
In this generation, the one chosen by the “Sword” wasn’t Caron Lissus—
It was Erin Lissus.
Geniuses were different from the very beginning.
Just by watching the knights train, Erin had reproduced the Lissus swordsmanship perfectly.
The path of her blade, drawn by her small body, was astonishingly flawless.
Corellia couldn’t help but admire that talent.
But it was something she could never allow.
‘Truly… fortunate.’
She recalled the eyes of the girl who had looked up at her.
“May I call you Mother?”
The girl who had clung to her like that—Corellia had coldly pushed her away.
And she hadn’t stopped there.
It was Corellia who made sure Erin would never be able to wield a sword.
