Chapter 23
Anette was horrified inwardly.
‘No!’
Regardless of her reaction, Hernan simply said what he wanted.
“I plan to wear it tomorrow as well, so have it sent to the imperial palace by tonight.”
“But there’s only one, and it has already been—by His Highness Ishar…”
Anette’s back was drenched. Cold sweat kept pouring down.
“I’ll take responsibility for what happens afterward.”
“……”
“Do you have any objections?”
Anette made a tearful face.
‘Your Highness Ishar… I’m sorry. And Your Highness, you’ve been used by Prince Hernan today…’
Holding back tears, she answered,
“Please spare my life, Your Highness.”
Hernan let out a scoff.
“Why would I kill you? How ridiculous.”
But Anette felt killing intent in that scoff.
* * *
The moment I woke from my long sleep, I could tell. My condition was not good.
I couldn’t get out of bed even until the sun was high in the sky.
When there was no sign of my strength returning, I gestured to Mini.
“Mini. Can you bring me the medicine Father got from the physician last time?”
“Yes, miss! Please wait a moment!”
Mini soon returned.
I propped up my upper body and took the medicine she brought.
I had been taking it every day to recover my strength, but I hadn’t really felt any improvement.
If anything, I felt weaker.
Still, it seemed better than not taking it at all, so I kept at it.
After I finished, Mini spoke.
“Miss, there’s a letter for you. I brought it while I went to get the medicine.”
“What is it?”
“It came from the imperial palace. Or… should I call it a love letter?”
Mini blushed shyly.
“A love letter? It’s way too early for that.”
I said that, but a soft smile lingered on my lips.
If it came from the palace, it was obviously from Hernan.
I read the letter.
“Lady Rinzel, this is Hernan.
The gathering you requested has been arranged for tomorrow.
I will come to escort you from the ducal residence at around four in the afternoon, so please be ready.”
Oh, Hernan. You arranged it so quickly.
After reading it, I placed the letter on the bedside table and lay back down.
“Miss, are you going to sleep?”
“Yeah. I need to recover my strength if I’m going to successfully host tomorrow’s gathering. I’ll take a nap until Rike comes back.”
Rike had gone to some tea party or something.
Anyway, I heard she went to a gathering to chat idly with other noble ladies.
Much more sociable than me, she often attended banquets and tea parties.
Unlike me, she didn’t lose strength every other day, so she could enjoy herself freely.
I found myself envying her.
Lately, I could barely leave my bed, so her freedom felt especially appealing.
Such a pointless desire.
To feel jealous of Rike, that beautiful and lovely girl.
“By the way, Mini.”
“Yes, miss.”
“Do you think… I’ll ever become healthy?”
“……Miss, why would you say that?”
Mini came closer, her voice trembling.
This was troublesome. I didn’t want to see a cute girl cry—especially because of me.
Did my wish to be healthy sound that sorrowful to her?
Did my frail appearance evoke pity?
I forced a cheerful tone.
“Hey, don’t cry. If you keep crying, you’ll make a puddle, you know? I didn’t mean to make you cry… I just said it because I’m so weak.”
“……”
Mini couldn’t answer, only sniffled.
This was bad. If I said anything more, she might burst into tears.
“I’m really going to sleep now. You should rest too.”
I pulled the blanket over myself and closed my eyes.
Perhaps the medicine Mini brought had a sedative effect, because sleep came quickly.
Just before drifting off, I felt Mini adjusting my hand that had slipped out from under the blanket.
I told her to rest, but she must be stubbornly staying by my side.
At the boundary between dreams and reality, I faintly heard her voice.
“…It didn’t work again…”
What didn’t work?
I wanted to ask, but I couldn’t fight off the sleep overtaking me.
In my dream, I saw Mini.
Not just Mini—but a crying Mini.
There was nothing around her. No sky, no wind, no seasons.
Mini was sitting on the ground, sobbing clearly.
My viewpoint slowly moved closer.
Then I saw a woman lying in front of her. Mini was clutching the woman’s pale, thin hand.
Tears fell onto the woman’s hand. The hand looked strangely familiar.
My gaze moved upward.
When I finally saw the woman’s face, I gasped.
“……!”
Even in the dream, I felt my heart racing.
The woman… had the same face as me.
No—she had Rinzel’s face.
Was it Rinzel?
Her eyes were closed, her complexion deathly pale.
She looked as if no blood would come out even if she were stabbed.
She looked dead.
Then suddenly, blood began pouring out from her eyes, nose, mouth—every opening on her face.
It soaked Mini.
Soon, even my vision turned red.
Everything… was crimson.
“—Hah!”
The moment I woke, I gasped for air.
My heart was pounding uncontrollably.
I looked at my hands. There was a faint reddish tint on my palms.
That was a relief.
At least they weren’t deathly pale like in the dream.
But the vivid afterimage of the dream wouldn’t fade.
The red scene lingered clearly.
Then I felt my stomach churn.
Maybe I got indigestion from taking medicine and sleeping immediately…
Just then, something surged up my throat.
Instinctively, I opened my mouth.
Something spilled out.
A mouthful of blood.
It stained the white sheets red.
“…Hemoptysis?”
Coughing up blood.
Since becoming Rinzel, this had never happened before.
And then—
I remembered something from the novel “Don’t Love Me, I’m Terminally Ill.”
Hemoptysis was something Rike, who had a weak heart, frequently experienced.
“….”
Rike’s symptoms appeared later in the story, when her heart condition worsened.
So why, at this early point in the story… was I the one coughing up blood?
I stared blankly at the blood for several minutes.
Then the door burst open.
Mini, who had stepped out briefly, returned—and screamed.
“M-Miss! Are you okay?!”
She rushed to my side.
“Where does it hurt?”
I grinned at her.
It had been a little scary when I coughed blood, but seeing how much she cared made me feel strangely good.
Being cared for sincerely… wasn’t such a bad thing.
“I’m fine, really. Do you know how much blood we have in our bodies? Coughing up a little won’t kill me. I won’t die.”
I won’t die.
It was meant to comfort Mini—but also myself.
I won’t die.
At least, Rinzel didn’t die in the novel.
Let’s just say the hemoptysis was due to poor condition. That made the most sense.
“I-I’ll call a doctor! Please wait!”
Mini ran out again.
Left alone, I wiped my lips with my sleeve.
Only then did I notice—it was dark.
It had been midday before I slept.
Had Rike returned?
* * *
It felt like a funeral.
Three people stood before me in tears.
Mini, Rike, and Father.
Father, who had been away often lately, rushed in as soon as he heard I coughed blood.
Rike, who had just returned, also came to see me.
Soon after, Mini brought the doctor.
The three of them looked like they were about to lose me.
Seriously… I’m not dying.
But I couldn’t tell them about the novel, which made things difficult.
Throughout the examination, I kept smiling, hoping it would calm them.
The doctor soon finished.
“…There is no major issue. It seems you coughed blood due to weakened vitality.”
See? I’m not dying.
“I will prescribe medicine to restore your energy. Please take it regularly.”
I answered obediently.
“Yes—.”
After the doctor left, the three still looked miserable.
I protested.
“Hey, all of you. Relax your faces, okay? I’m really fine.”
But Rike said,
“But Rinzel… this is the first time you’ve coughed blood. I’m really worried.”
Still, Rike…
I couldn’t help but think—
If I took your suffering instead,
If this meant you’d cough blood less in the future,
Then I wouldn’t mind going through this again.
Would you ever understand how I feel?
