IRRY 08

Chapter 8

After going out to the streets with Rickton, Cotton gradually began going outside more often. She never went far—only to the small rear garden behind the imperial palace—but rather than the splendidly displayed gardens meant to be admired, she frequently walked toward the small courtyard where weeds grew mixed among the plants.

“Can we go back inside already?”

Because she had to follow Cotton around, Shaildy grew increasingly annoyed. She seemed to hate the blazing sunlight, shouting continuously from the shaded gazebo.

“Your Majesty the Empress! Are you listening?”

Cotton, who had been crouching in front of a flowerbed, looked back at her. She then turned her head again and continued rustling around in the plants. After a moment, she stood up.

Both arms were filled with a large bundle of flowers of many different kinds.

Walking over to the gazebo, Cotton spread the flowers across the table in the center and sat down, beginning to sort them by type.

“You can go in first. I’ll come after I finish this.”

“Leave Your Majesty here alone and go back? What kind of nonsense is that?”

Even though she complained every time, hadn’t she always let Cotton wander alone before? Cotton found the change strange, but she could somewhat understand Shaildy’s new attitude.

After deciding to search for her memories, Cotton had been spending time with Rickton every few days, and recently they had even gone out together. It seemed the servants and maids had heard about it.

“Honestly… Look at your clothes! What is this? Do you have no caution at all?”

Shaildy stared in horror at the dirt smeared on Cotton’s dress. Her narrowed eyes scanned Cotton from head to toe as if questioning whether she truly belonged to the nobility.

“I really don’t understand why you insist on flower arranging when you’re so bad at it.”

Cotton couldn’t argue with the tone of contempt.

Because even she had to admit she had absolutely no talent for flower arranging.

She carefully trimmed each flower with scissors and placed them into an empty vase, but the result always looked messy and uneven. No matter how many times she tried again, even using brighter, more luxurious flowers, the result never improved.

Meanwhile, Shaildy’s constant nagging filled her ears, and the stems and leaves scratched her hands until they became rough.

And yet Cotton never stopped.

If anything, she tried to do it more deliberately.

Whenever she filled the vase with flowers that caught her eye, the thoughts clouding her mind like thick smoke would momentarily fade away.

When she focused, time passed quickly.

Perhaps it was because she now had an important goal—finding her memories.

If she simply stayed still doing nothing, she began to feel like a useless person.

Why can’t I remember?

Am I lacking determination?

Am I simply stupid?

What if I’m not actually Renedia…?

Every train of thought always ended the same way.

Whenever her thoughts grew too long like this, there were many days when she simply slept all day. In that sense, going out for walks or arranging flowers was actually a big improvement.

Cotton carried the finished vase back to her room.

Even though its shape was clumsy and uneven, she was satisfied with it, so she always decorated her room with it once it was finished. When the flowers withered, she would go back to the garden and repeat the process again.

“Where should I put it today?”

After thinking for a moment, Cotton placed the vase not on the usual shelf near the window, but on a small bedside table tucked away in the corner beside her bed.

“Maybe it’ll wither a little faster here…?”

Sitting at the edge of the bed, Cotton gazed quietly at the flowers and lightly tapped a petal with her finger.

The tiny flower, like small clusters of white snowflakes, swayed gently.

It was a flower that always ended up in her arrangements and appeared in overwhelming quantities each time.

There were many other flowers that were more colorful and splendid, yet for some reason her eyes always drifted back to this one. Naturally, her hands reached for it more often as well.

Perhaps it was because of the way the small petals gathered together into a soft, fluffy cluster.

Bringing her face closer to the unfamiliar flower, Cotton tilted her head.

“I feel like I’ve smelled this before.”

She was certain it was a flower she didn’t know.

Yet the pleasant scent tickling the tip of her nose felt strangely familiar.

* * *

Through the half-open door, the room inside was clearly visible.

Rickton, who had been about to knock, instead crossed his arms and quietly watched.

Renedia seemed unaware of his presence as she adjusted the position of the vase.

She turned it this way and that with great seriousness.

Rickton let out a faint, incredulous laugh.

All that effort… for something like that.

Even with the smallest tasks, she used to concentrate so deeply that she wouldn’t hear anything around her.

But fussing over the position of a vase like that?

She looked so carefree, completely unaware of his intentions.

After tilting her head repeatedly while adjusting the arrangement, Renedia finally seemed satisfied after quite some time and withdrew her hands completely.

At that moment, Rickton straightened up from where he had been leaning against the doorway.

He stepped forward to enter.

Then suddenly stopped.

A shadow darkened his eyes.

Renedia, lightly adjusting the outer shape of the bouquet, pulled out one flower among the colorful ones—a white, leafy blossom.

She closed her eyes slightly as she enjoyed its scent, a beautiful smile slowly spreading across her face.

Rickton’s expression instantly twisted into a deep frown.

Without turning back even once, he walked away.

Rickton?

Wait—don’t come any closer…!

What’s that in your hand? Is it a flower? Don’t hide it. Did you bring it for me?

No. I was going to throw this away—hey, give it back!

Then who were you collecting it so carefully for? Ah… it smells nice.

…It’s just a common flower that grows everywhere along the road. I’ll buy you something prettier. Give that back.

No. It’s mine now.

She must have received countless magnificent bouquets before.

Yet with just three plain flowers, her eyes curved gently with happiness and a bright smile bloomed on her lips.

Inside her lively gray eyes—sparkling like they held morning dew—was the reflection of a boy whose face had turned red.

Now whenever I see this flower on the road, I’ll think of you—

Bang.

Rickton slammed his fist against the corridor wall.

The illusion vanished.

It felt like waking from a dream.

“If you’ve lost your memory, then act like you’ve lost it.”

The words slipped through his clenched teeth and scattered into the empty air.

“…Damn it.”

* * *

Cotton stood in front of her door, quietly staring at the doorknob.

Opening it was easy.

Leaving the imperial palace was easy too.

Walking around inside was no problem either.

But there was one destination that made her steps unbearably heavy.

“He must be busy…”

It had been nearly a month since Rickton last visited.

Since his visits stopped without any notice, the worries already gnawing at her slowly began to crawl up inside her.

Was he simply unable to make time?

Had he given up on helping her recover her memories?

Or had she simply become unnecessary?

Whenever Rickton came to see her carrying items, Cotton felt secretly happy.

She believed it meant he was certain she was Renedia.

Strangely, that thought made her both sad and grateful at the same time.

Regardless of the reason, those moments when he was beside her made her happy.

But now he no longer came.

As the days of waiting grew longer, the trembling anticipation that the door might open gradually faded like burned-out firewood.

Cotton tightly gripped the doorknob.

But she couldn’t bring herself to turn it.

Perhaps because of her past experiences of being treated like an invisible person and being rejected, the uncertain waiting almost felt easier.

If she went to see him and things repeated the same way…

She was afraid she might be hurt even more.

After hesitating for a long time, she finally stepped out into the corridor.

If he truly was busy, seeing it with her own eyes would reassure her.

And if he had begun to give up, perhaps showing her determination to recover her memories would make him come see her again.

After smoothing her hair neatly to one side—though she had already checked it in the mirror—she headed toward Rickton’s office.

If Shaildy had been there, she would surely have stopped her from disturbing His Majesty the Emperor.

But since she had stepped out on an errand, Cotton walked comfortably through the corridor.

She stopped in front of the door engraved with golden patterns.

Just as she raised her hand to knock—

The door suddenly swung open without a sound.

Cotton’s eyes widened in surprise.

The man stepping out of the office also froze when he saw her.

His beard-covered chin moved slightly.

“It has been a while, Your Majesty the Empress. Have you been well?”

“…I have been well.”

It was Edler Negraford—Rickton’s older brother, who had once been the First Prince.

Cotton sighed inwardly.

Her timing could not have been worse.

His sky-blue eyes narrowed as he stared directly at her.

Even though staring at someone so openly was clearly rude, the man continued to observe her as if trying to peer into her thoughts.

“Is His Majesty inside?”

Cotton deliberately turned her head and glanced toward the office.

Edler also looked back briefly.

His messy, slightly curly hair brushed against his shoulders.

“He’s inside. But more importantly…”

“…?”

“I heard you’ve been dedicating yourself to recovering your memories lately. I was wondering if anything has come back to you.”

“…I don’t think that’s something you need to know.”

For someone as gentle as Cotton usually was, it was an unusually sharp reply.

But Edler merely smiled faintly, lifting his hollow cheeks.

“That’s true.”

As if his business was finished, he gave a polite farewell and headed toward the central staircase.

Cotton watched his back with a slight frown.

Edler was originally the one who should have inherited the throne and become emperor.

However, when Rickton and Cotton married, the throne was passed not to the First Prince—but to Rickton, the Second Prince.

After the coronation ceremony ended, Edler immediately received the title of duke and was sent to a separate territory—not too far, but not particularly close either.

“Exiled” would be the more accurate description.

However, he was summoned to the imperial palace every quarter.

Cotton did not know the exact reason, but according to rumors among the palace staff, it was to keep him under surveillance.

So today happened to be the day he came to the palace.