Chapter 9
Thinking about it, that alone already didn’t make sense.
‘I’m not even a real saint, so why did the hail suddenly stop?’
What’s more, the timing was suspiciously perfect.
The moment the crowd started saying, “If she’s a real saint, then she should at least be able to stop hail falling from a clear sky,” the hail immediately stopped.
I didn’t think this anomaly was a coincidence, so I subtly tested the lion.
Because there was only one being here capable of such divine coordination.
‘Judging by the reaction… I was right.’
As I grinned, the lion—who had been rolling its eyes awkwardly—scratched the back of its head with a large front paw.
“So I got caught.”
Watching the lion laugh foolishly, I clicked my tongue inwardly.
‘Yeah, of course it’s not a divine beast candidate.’
But at the same time, I felt a quiet sense of relief.
At least I had avoided getting my head chopped off for impersonating a saint.
“Then the verification from His Holiness shouldn’t be a problem, right?”
I expected the lion to hesitate and then nod.
Since it was its own doing, taking responsibility for it seemed only natural.
But contrary to my expectations, the lion shook its head.
“Sorry, but I can’t engrave the mark of Hedel on your forehead.”
“…Pardon? Why not?”
My expression stiffened at the unexpected answer.
‘I thought someone capable of stopping a disaster would have no problem showing a mark like that.’
Besides, the mark didn’t even need to stay permanently on my forehead.
It only needed to appear temporarily during the Pope’s verification.
“Don’t tell me… your power can’t even do that?”
Getting anxious, I leaned my face closer to the lion.
The lion, slightly leaning back as if uncomfortable, spoke.
“That’s not it. It’s nothing that simple. My abilities are far greater than you think!”
“Then why can’t you do it?”
At my confused expression, the lion sighed as if I were hopeless.
“That’s Hedel’s authority. No matter how strong I am, I can’t casually interfere with a goddess’s divine power. That would be sacrilege.”
“Hah, and here I was worried about some serious reason.”
Relieved that it wasn’t a real problem, I glared at it.
“Since when do you care about sacrilege? Weren’t you just badmouthing her earlier—calling her a fraud and all that?”
“Cough! Th-that was just me venting because Hedel didn’t keep her promise! And talking behind her back is one thing, interfering with divine authority is another!”
Flustered, the lion shouted.
Annoyed, I smacked my chest.
“This is ridiculous. Who said I was trying to become a real saint? I just need to pretend for a moment. People’s lives are on the line here—surely even the goddess would understand that!”
In truth, it could easily be considered blasphemy that would incur divine wrath.
But I had no other choice.
Besides, the moment I started impersonating a saint, the sacrilege had already begun.
So I pressed on with persuasion.
But the lion remained unexpectedly firm.
“No. I said I can’t do it!”
It covered both ears with its front paws as if refusing to listen.
My frustration skyrocketed.
‘This stupid lion!’
It was the same creature that once insisted on entrusting its retirement to me if I became a saint, and now it was suddenly talking about sacrilege?
Just as I was about to shout that if I died, its retirement would die too—
“…That is…”
Something caught my eye.
A brown powder was scattered through the lion’s cream-colored mane.
The remains of the cookies it had just devoured.
‘Come to think of it, it really did enjoy those cheap cookies.’
A thought flashed through my mind, and I slowly curled my lips into a smile.
“About those cookies you just ate…”
At that moment, the lion, which had been covering its ears, snapped its head toward me.
Its previously annoyed eyes now held a spark of interest.
Seeing that reaction exactly as expected, I smiled.
“I told you, right? Those cookies are low-grade—reduced sugar and butter to cut costs. Even the flour is whole wheat, unrefined, so the texture is kind of rough.”
“R-really? I thought they tasted fine. Nutty, slightly sweet, and the texture wasn’t bad at all.”
“Well, that’s because you’ve been eating moss for the past thousand years. Your taste buds are basically ruined. Not exactly something fit for a divine beast candidate.”
I clicked my tongue sympathetically and looked into the distance.
“A proper cookie is made by finely milling wheat after removing the bran, mixing it with plenty of milk and butter. And of course, lots and lots of white sugar.”
As I spoke, the lion’s eyes gradually grew dazed, as if hypnotized.
“You bake that dough at the right temperature, and you get soft, rich, sweet cookies…”
Gulp.
The sound of swallowing echoed through the carriage.
Clearly, my explanation was working.
“One bite of those soft cookies…”
I brought my thumb and index finger to my mouth, mimed biting the air, and clasped my face in bliss.
“Ah… that’s the taste of heaven.”
The lion, still dazed, moved its lips slightly as if imagining it.
I suppressed a triumphant smile and sighed instead.
“But unfortunately, I can’t offer those delicious cookies to our divine beast.”
“What? Why not!”
The lion jumped in shock, grabbing my shoulder tightly with its front paw.
‘Ugh, you greedy beast.’
Suppressing the sting in my shoulder, I continued.
“Well, if I fail the temple’s verification, I’ll be executed. Dead people can’t exactly deliver cookies, can they?”
“D-dead?!”
“Of course. Who would spare someone who dared impersonate the daughter of a goddess?”
I lowered my eyes sorrowfully.
“Come to think of it, if I die, your retirement plans are ruined too. No matter how much of a divine emissary you are, you’re still a beast. They won’t let you roam free—you’d be locked up and tamed in a cage.”
“What? Who would dare imprison me?! A mere human?!”
The lion, who had spent a thousand years trapped in a cave only to finally gain freedom, erupted in outrage at the idea of being caged again.
But I ignored it and continued calmly.
“Ah, what a pity. A divine beast candidate reduced to eating food given by humans, unable to even enjoy cookies…”
“No, I said I’m not going to be imprisoned! Even if I were, I could escape easily!”
“Where would you even go? Even if you returned home, all your old companions would be gone—only younger ones remain. What kind of bond would you share with them?”
Repeating back its own words from earlier, I watched its expression harden.
“Not even friendship—at best, they’ll tolerate you. A so-called ‘candidate divine beast,’ but in reality just a foolish old beast tricked by a goddess. Younger lions would laugh at you endlessly…”
“W-what did you say?! Foolish old beast?!”
“You’d grow older and more pitiful, laughed at by the young ones. Alone and miserable. Ah, our poor divine beast. There won’t even be cookies in the forest…”
I dabbed at my eyes as if crying in sympathy.
The lion’s face twisted in complete despair.
“Enough, enough! Are you cursing me?! Cursing me?! Fine! I’ll pass your stupid verification!”
Finally, it shouted in frustration, giving in.
“You should’ve said that from the beginning. Now we’re in this together.”
I smiled and shrugged, while the lion pounded its chest in anger before letting out a deep sigh.
“Well, I do owe Hedel… I guess I can explain it later.”
“Yes, yes. The gracious goddess will forgive everything.”
I nodded firmly and held out my hand.
“Alright, let’s do our best from now on.”
With a reluctant look, the lion finally shook my hand.
That was the moment our partnership was formally established.
“…By the way, how many cookies are we talking about? Surely at least once per day, right?”
“……”
Thus began a very flimsy fraud syndicate—formed entirely on the promise of a few cookies.
